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I was just talking to a friend of mine who had an interesting experience:

She and a friend of hers were speeding along a quiet neighbourhood, when all of a sudden a police officer pulled them over. Now, first thing most people would do is panic, but these two people kept their cool and actually managed to have a nice chat with the officer. Long story short, he didn’t sign a ticket and, awkwardly, asked for the number of the girl.

Regardless if he got it or not, I was wondering what I’d do in a similar situation (albeit, with a female cop):

The officer just saved you $50 or more and all they ask for in return is your number because they find you attractive and maybe even interesting. Should you feel obliged to give it to them? If you would, is it because you feel obliged to, because said officer kept your records clean or is it because the officer commands respect and you wouldn’t dare oppose someone in such a function? Would you give them your details based on a purely social evaluation, not taking the officer’s job into consideration?

Now, what would happen if the situation was slightly altered: replace the cop with a soldier, would you still feel that the job commands the same respect as a police officer does? Does a soldier command more respect? What about a firefighter, a (commercial) pilot?

If you give them your details, would you go for something highly associatable, like your land line number, something you could easily get rid off, like a prepaid cellphone number or would you go for a, rather anonymous email address?

An interesting topic to think about.

February 14th, Valentine’s Day, a day that is traditionally used to express your love and affection towards those with whom you share a familiar love with, but also towards those you share romantic love with (and if you’re lucky enough to be able to have a 2-for-1 deal going, even better!)

Today is about showing your partner(s) how much you care about them, your chance to thank them for all the things they do. Things you might have started to take for granted, but believe me, they are not. So get out there (if you haven’t already done so) and surprise your loved one(s). They deserve it.

While you’re at it, you might want to consider extending Valentine’s Day beyond it’s original scope of only showing your gratitude towards loved ones, you might want to think about including those people you admire too, like I’m about to do:

We’ve met a few years ago, yet it sometimes feels like only yesterday. We’ve been through good times and the obligatory bad times, we’ve even been through no-times, that is, the dark period without regular contact. We’ve shared secrets with each other that other’s still aren’t privy too and probably never will be.

Yes, we’ve had our fair share of disagreements but we managed to pull through, most of the time. Our friendship, if you want to call it that, has been faced with events that would have destroyed any other friendship, yet, ours miraculously survived, even if it was put on life-support by me soon thereafter. In hindsight, it seems hardly thankful, after all the things you’ve done for me and believe me, there isn’t a day I don’t feel guilty about it. That same guilt is what kept me from telling you this a lot sooner, that same guilt, is what keept me from hangin’ out with you in the past.

In times of trouble, no matter which kind, you have stood by me, you have protected me and you stood up for me, even though you didn’t have to. You were there for me when I needed someone to talk to and you allowed me to help you when you needed someone to talk to.

You managed to captivate my mind and heart the day we first met and you continue to amaze me until this very day. You possess a gift, an inner strength that is unlike anything I have ever witnessed. You somehow overcome events that cripple others for a lifetime and even though I know that deep inside you, a little part of you succumbs to the pressure, you never show, you are always the same, blissful person.

I respect that and I admire you for it, a lot. So, here’s to you! You know who you are.

The past year, for me personally, was a year of change. Like the years before, I got to meet a lot of great people and I even got to know some of them quite well.

What follows is a list of the people that influenced me the most this year, from a personal or professional point of view, or whom I’m just thankful for for being part of my life. Oh, and in case you’re wondering – the list is ordered in counter clockwise geographical order, meaning we start out in Canada and end in the Netherlands.

Katie, I’ve known you for close to two years now and you still continue to amaze me. I value the input you give me when I ask for it and I appreciate your enthusiasm when I break any idea to you. You helped me out a lot more than you probably know when I was going through a rough time and I am thankful beyond words for that. You always know how to cheer me up when I need it and you seem to be capable of providing the right answers and insights when I’m not. Thank you.

Ben, you’ve introduced me to a great deal of media I wouldn’t have experienced without you. You seem to know what kind of song or movie or series I’m longing for and are able to provide just that. It may be coincidence, but I’m still thankful. You have shown remarkable strength in a time when you were down on the ground and I respect that a lot, most people your age would just “break”, you didn’t. I know that, because the conversations we have show that you are miles ahead of people who are five years older. You, my friend, are destined for greatness.

Scott, from a business point of view, I couldn’t be more thankful. You always have one gig or another for me to work on, be it for your company or for Sigler Media. I respect you highly on a professional level, because you know how to get things done, but also because you seem to be able to put up with my (sometimes) slacking attitude. You present me with the possibility to come up with my own, creative, solution and hardly ever limit my flow of ideas. On a personal level, you have been a source of inspiration for me. You show me how important it is to pursue one’s own ideas and not just “quit” when times are rough. Thank you.

Josef, without you, I wouldn’t probably be writing this post, because without you, I wouldn’t have a server to maintain. While it may seem purely technical to most, thanks to you, I can broaden my knowledge on the technical aspects of maintaining an online presence and therefore you contribute to upping my market value. Believe me when I say that your contribution is very much appreciated.

Kevin, you can be a royal pain in the butt, but when you decide to cooperate, the real “you” surfaces and with that, skills that far surpass mine. One of the youngest designers I know, you have produced works that I admire, for the simplicity and quality contained within. Thanks for the inspiration (and sometimes even guidance) you provide.

Jack, we’ve only met some ten weeks ago, yet we’ve had some of the weirdest but also most sincere conversations I’ve had this year. It’s really odd to meet someone who is so much like I am. Whenever we talked, I recognized how your life, in many situations, seems to be a nearly identical version of mine. I’m glad I finally found someone who appreciates life the same way I do.

L., you, even though you probably didn’t even realize, opened my eyes to the finer aspects of culture. You influenced me on a purely personal level and somehow I (want to) believe that I’m a better person for it. Dank je.

Apart from those five, I also owe thanks to the group of people who contributed and are contributing to my upcoming movie(s) as well as the two Jeroens for maintaining my server when I’m unable to set any time aside for doing so and for ensuring that a huge group of CS:S players are able to enjoy a high quality gaming experience.

Thanks to all of you, 2006 was as great as it was, thanks to all of you, my skills, both on a professional and on a social level, have expanded more than they could have without you. You rock, each and every one of you.

Twenty years ago when people referenced their friends, they generally talked about people they knew for a very long time. Relationships lasted long, friendships lasted even longer. Basically, most friends you made back then were going to stick around till the bitter end and you’d meet up with them on various occasions.

I’m no researcher, but I think that the above concept of relationships and friendships is outdated. Don’t get me wrong, I value people who stick around for a long time, stand by you during the good and the bad times and help you overcome obstacles, but I personally don’t see it happening for many people I know.

Let me elaborate, during the last decades, our mobility increased by 500%, going shopping in London in the weekend (no matter where you live) is easily accomplished. Participating in a relationship with someone who’s living some 2,000 miles away is doable. Making acquaintances all over the globe and meeting them at some point is daily life for some people.

With all the added mobility however, comes another feat: priority and prioritizing. Many people have various levels of friendship – there are the close friends, the very close friends, the good friends, the normal friends, the friends –friends, the yeah-I-heard-his-name-kind-of-guys (and gals). Two decades ago you had best friends, friends and people you knew. Now, with all these added layers, people are prioritizing, some on a conscious level, most on a subconscious level.

Friends are like information in today’s world. Everyone has a story to tell, everyone has one quirk or another and we have to remember each and every one of them, or at least a great deal. One might note all this information in a notebook, another might use digital technology to track the attributes of their friends and someone else might just remember most stuff. Either way, people have to cope with loads of extra information that wasn’t available (because of the lack of different layers) twenty years ago.

Naturally, it’s important to remember many attributes of your friends; after all, that is what partially makes you a good friend. Supporting each other, no matter if romance is involved or not is still as important as it was two decades ago, but today you have a lot more choices. Do you want to talk to your best friend or your partner? To which one are you going to talk to? The one you are romantically involved with or the one you’ve been dating a year ago?

Added layers mean lower intensity. At least, they do for me. I have a certain amount of time I’m willing and am able to spend on friends every day, week, month and the more friends you have, the more you need to spread that time out in a fair way. If you have loads of friends, you’re probably not spending half as much time as you should (and would like to) with them, if you have few friends, you can focus a lot more on the individual, but you lack the added information; information that can be turned into knowledge to improve yourself, your character or your creations, in the most broad sense possible.

All in all, I personally experience micro relationships as very positive. I believe that these relationships are a lot more flexible and they don’t have a clearly defined beginning (or end). You meet ad-hoc, whenever it suits both persons, you have fewer expectations to meet, yet you can still contribute a lot to such friendship, it’s all up to you.

Naturally the concept of micro relationships doesn’t apply to people in a marriage, but then again, some might argue that marriages are a form of the past too …

I wonder what others are thinking - feel free to contribute.